Wholly Guacamole

This is a true Tex-Mex recipe concocted by a distant relative stationed at the Alamo nearly 160 years ago. According to family lore, he was out looking for some good tomatoes when Santa Ana attacked the now famous Texas landmark. Luckily, our relative kept this recipe in the lining of his coon-skin cap, and both he and his avocado dip lived to fight another day. Years later, near death from an infected Chihuahua bite, he looked deep into his son's eyes, and with his last breath, uttered the familiar phrase "Remember... the...guacamole."